So Your Teen Thinks He’s the Boss?

Is your teen convinced they're the next big thing? You're not alone. When a 13-year-old starts acting like they run the world, it can leave any parent feeling baffled and exhausted. Here's how to deflate that oversized ego gently and guide them back to planet Earth.

Firstly, recognize this: a big ego often hides big insecurities. Teens are trying to figure out who they are, and sometimes, they overcompensate. Yes, it's frustrating when your kid lectures you on everything from money-making to diaper-changing, but it's often a plea for recognition and respect.

Here's your game plan:

1. Stay calm and don't take the bait. Arguing with a teen in full know-it-all mode is like wrestling with a tornado. Instead, acknowledge their feelings ("It sounds like you've really thought about this") but set firm boundaries about respect.

2. Channel that confidence into responsibilities. If they think they're ready to run the world, start with their world. More chores, more accountability. If they're critiquing how things are done, give them a chance to show how it's done right—under your guidance, of course.

3. Encourage empathy. Sometimes, teens struggle to see beyond their own nose. Volunteer opportunities or activities that require teamwork can help them appreciate others' contributions and challenges.

4. Cool the hotheads: When conversations heat up, keep your cool. It's like being a firefighter – you don't fight fire with fire. Set clear boundaries for respectful communication. A simple rule like 'We speak to others the way we want to be spoken to' should hang in every room.

5. Keep communication open. He might act like he knows everything, but deep down, he still needs guidance. Regular, casual chats can help him feel supported and less inclined to prove himself all the time.

6. Consider professional help if needed. If his temper and attitude are disrupting daily life, a therapist might help him navigate these choppy teen waters more smoothly.

Here are a few ways to channel that energy creatively!

1. Role Reversal Exercise: Set up a day where your teen takes on the role of a parent, and you play the teen. This exercise can provide a fun yet impactful way for them to see the challenges of parenting and decision-making. It can be an eye-opener for how they might come across during discussions.

2. Develop a Project Together: Start a project that requires long-term commitment, such as building a piece of furniture, gardening, or even a business idea they have. This will not only teach them the value of hard work and planning but also give them a realistic sense of what it takes to achieve goals.

3. Engage in Debates: If your teen likes to argue, use it constructively! Engage them in structured debates on various topics. This can help sharpen their reasoning and listening skills, and you can gently challenge their views in a controlled, respectful environment.

4. Literature and Movies: Introduce them to books and films that portray strong, nuanced characters who learn the value of humility and teamwork. Discuss these themes and characters to subtly address their behavior and attitudes.

5. Encourage Part-Time Work: If possible, encourage your teen to take up a part-time job. Working in service roles such as retail or hospitality can be a great humbling experience and teach valuable interpersonal skills.

6. Skill Swap: Have your teen teach you something they excel in, and in exchange, you teach them something. This can be a sport, a tech skill, or even cooking a meal. It’s a great way to show mutual respect for each other's abilities and learn together.

This post is inspired by Reddit user Lady_Gator7’s question 

DISCLAIMER: Just a friendly heads-up—this isn’t professional advice! Our newsletter is purely educational and meant to help guide you through the maze of parenting teens and tweens. Every child is unique, so please consider your own circumstances and maybe chat with a professional if you need specific advice. Stay curious and keep learning!